Amen, Robert Kirby

Here’s the thing: She doesn’t leave you or her church. What now? Do you focus on the difference or on the things you still love about her? Do you still try to be worthy of her love in every other respect?

Lots of people in this situation don’t. She nags you about the church. You sneer at her beliefs. Eventually religion isn’t the problem anymore. It’s just the battlefield where you fight over everything else.

Eventually your spouse is not the person you thought you married. But if you’re willing to abandon the person you swore to love forever over a shift in belief, then neither are you.

You don’t end up getting divorced because of religion. More than likely you divorce because one or both of you couldn’t tell the difference between control and love.

Whole thing here.


Comments

Amen, Robert Kirby — 3 Comments

  1. If it were just me and my spouse, it would be an easy fix: just never talk about it to each other (though obviously that’s not the track you take, Ms. Jack). However if we have to raise kids together then it becomes much much more complicated.

  2. If it were just me and my spouse, it would be an easy fix: just never talk about it to each other (though obviously that’s not the track you take, Ms. Jack)

    Actually, these days, it kind of is. I don’t talk about faith with him very much anymore. We discuss the logistics of raising our child(ren), and I remind him of his meeting times and whatnot. But I barely say anything to him about religion anymore, and we certainly don’t pray together very often.

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